"Yes, and" : Balancing Gratitude with the Courage to Resist
It’s important to me to give accolades when I feel them—though sometimes, I don't have time... or I simply tell myself, "I don't have time." And then, sometimes, we choose not to give those accolades because, while we appreciate the product or service, we don't like what the company stands for or the actions—or inactions—they've taken on important policies such as DEIA (Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Accessibility) or basic human rights.
Is there someone you would like to thank but just haven’t “had a chance” yet? I invite you to create that opportunity today. Acknowledging and celebrating the people who have supported you isn’t just for you—it’s for them, for us, and for the collective healing of the world. It’s a generous act over a competitive one. It’s also a reminder for yourself—and the world—that you are not alone. It takes a community of people to accomplish what we do every single day.
Yes, there are many things we do alone—directly. But indirectly, there are so many people and systems—products, services, organizations—that support and enhance our ability to do what we do. And as we continue to build and live in our world, we must remember not to overlook these supports.
It’s also true that we need to continue speaking out and standing up for the things we believe in, regardless of the fear of political retaliation. Some might say that giving certain people or companies credit for what they do well—while they’re pulling back on DEIA, women's rights, and LGBTQ+ rights—isn't in our best interest. And yes, I agree that we should question where we direct our gratitude and support. However, I believe we can do both. We can be grateful for what’s good while also asking for more from these same people and organizations. It's the principle of "Yes, And"—you don’t have to choose one or the other. We can, and should, do both.
Here’s a small example: I am deeply grateful for all the technology that allows me to connect with clients and family around the globe. It keeps me organized (which is a challenge since I have an innate desire for piles of paper everywhere 😂).
So, I’ll shout out to Google, reMarkable, and Apple for the products they’ve created that help me tremendously. They’ve allowed me to save/get rid of so much paper and made tech much easier to work with —among other reasons to appreciate these products. And, as I celebrate their wonderful products, services, and excellent customer service, I also ask them to consider, if they haven’t already, standing up against hate, inequities, and the rollback of policies like DEIA. These are policies designed to honor our global society. These companies are bigger than this.
Kudos to Apple for continuing to stand firm in their commitment to DEIA, even when facing pressure from government and conservative groups. I must also mention Harvard University, whose recent actions against the government’s stance on DEI have been a powerful affirmation and modeling of standing for what’s right. While I don’t attend Harvard or have a direct connection to Harvard University, I am incredibly grateful for their courage and leadership. It’s not easy, but it’s meaningful and it’s critically necessary.
Google, I’d love to know your stance and current actions (or inactions) regarding DEIA. What are you doing to ensure your policies reflect a commitment to inclusion and equity?
reMarkable, can you please share your current position on DEIA policies? Transparency in these matters matters, and your community—your customers—would benefit from knowing where you stand.
When we acknowledge both the beauty and the complexity within the systems and people we rely on, we participate in a deeper kind of gratitude—one that doesn’t ignore injustice, but also doesn’t withhold appreciation. It’s the power of “Yes, And.” Yes, we can be thankful. And we can hold others—and ourselves—accountable to a higher standard of care, inclusion, and equity.
Offering appreciation doesn't mean we've stopped advocating for change. It means we believe change is possible, and that honoring what's good is part of building what's better. Gratitude and justice are not opposites; they're partners in healing.
So before you move on with your day, pause and ask yourself:
Who haven’t you thanked yet—and what’s stopping you?
Where in your life can you say both thank you and do better?
What does “Yes, and” look like in your work life today?
How can you strike a balance between appreciating companies or individuals and holding them accountable for their actions (or inactions) regarding DEIA?
Action Steps:
As you move through your day, take a moment to reflect on where you can both offer appreciation and advocate for change. Who or what are you genuinely grateful for—and how can you express that gratitude in a way that also calls in accountability? Whether it's writing a thank-you note with intention, researching a company’s DEIA stance, or simply asking a thoughtful question, you have the power to influence the culture around you. Let your voice be one that values both gratitude and justice—because the world needs more of both.
I look forward to having this conversation with you. Your comments, learnings, and reflections are always welcome.
In solidarity and with joy,
Misha Safran, PCC, MA
Keynote Speaker and Relationship Coach and Strategist for the Home and Workplace
Land Acknowledgement: Born on the land of the Anacostans, Piscataway, and Pamunkey peoples. Currently living on Karkin Ohlone land.
All are valued in my practice: BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, humans of all backgrounds and ages. Through sharing my pronouns, I hope to support a safer and braver space for all professionals to share their pronouns.
#empathy #emotionalIntelligence #wellbeing #duality #resilience #educators #teachers #doctors #humanresources #healthyworkplace #conflict #disputeresolution #both #yes-and
