One for One, One for All, or an Eye for an Eye?
This is a complex month. Across the globe, events are unfolding that evoke a whirlwind of emotions—grief, hope, anger, and resilience. We are a complex human race, and within that complexity lies a vast disparity in our hopes, desires, attitudes, and actions.
Some humans dedicate their lives to the betterment of all, actively working to heal divides, challenge injustices, and uplift communities.
Some focus solely on the betterment of themselves and those who look, think, or act like them, often creating barriers instead of bridges.
Others are simply trying to survive—moving through each day hour by hour, doing what they can to keep going.
And then there are those who are so physically, mentally, or emotionally depleted that they can barely participate in life, trapped in the shadows of exhaustion or illness.
Where are you in this spectrum? Yes, you—the one reading this. What do you believe your role is in this life?
Is your purpose rooted in creating financial security for your children or other family members, ensuring a future that is stable and promising?
Perhaps you prioritize leaving an emotional legacy—living a life of connection, service, and compassion that shapes how your descendants may show up in the world?
Perhaps you feel torn—between the tears of loss and the smiles of joy, between the pain of injustice and the thrill of possibility. It’s okay to feel conflicted; our lives are as layered and intricate as the global events that shape them.
We are navigating times that stretch us in unimaginable ways. The tragedy of New Orleans, the looming disasters in Los Angeles, the continued genocide in Gaza, the divisive undertones of the US 2025 Inauguration, and the enduring legacy of Martin Luther King Jr.—each of these demands our attention. They remind us that life is not just about existing but about participating, with purpose, in a collective human story.
So, I ask you again: where do you find yourself in all of this? What steps can you take to move from fear and competition toward empathy, generosity, and action?
Empathy in action isn’t just about understanding others; it’s about doing something with that understanding. But this is no easy task—especially when emotions run high and situations test your resolve.
Last month, I faced a moment that tested my own commitment to empathy. I was trying to find a parking space while feeling tired and weak from a flare-up. I only use my parking placard during these flares, and as I approached the disabled parking spots, I saw cars parked without proper signage. Maybe they forgot to put it there, maybe they were parked illegally - I couldn't know. I took a breath and continued to seek a parking spot as close to my destination as possible.
Eventually, I found a spot and politely asked a woman standing there to move so I could park. Her response caught me off guard. “Uh, no! I’m saving it for my husband,” she said. I explained my disability and kindly asked again, only to be met with a scoff and dismissal, "Yeah, right. Whatever". Another woman was leaving and called me over. I drove around to the facing spot and the former woman walked over to where I was, and stood in front my car staring at me as I pulled in. She then proceeded to walk up and down the side of my car yelling at me, "Yea, right, like you're really disabled", "You're not disabled". By this point, I was so rattled, I had to text my family, who was already inside, to come and help me walk in.
By the time my son arrived to help me walk inside, I was shaking, my heart racing, and tears streaming down my face. I wanted to feel peace and enjoy lunch with my family, but the experience caused me to feel rattled. Later, I discovered that while I was inside, this woman had keyed my car—a final act of anger and resentment.
In that moment, I allowed myself to truly feel the sadness and confusion. What made her question my need? Why did she act with such hatred? And yet, amidst my hurt, I chose empathy—not as an excuse for her behavior, but as a way to protect my own energy and emotional well-being. Hurt people, hurt people. While I can’t know her story, I can choose not to perpetuate the cycle of pain.
Take a moment to reflect:
What does it look like to live for yourself AND for the betterment of all people?
How might you contribute to healing the divides around you rather than reinforcing them?
What small step can you take today to align your life with the values of empathy, generosity, and a shared humanity?
A life rooted in service, empathy, and action isn’t free of challenges, but it is filled with meaning. It’s a life that transcends the fleeting satisfaction of competition and steps boldly into the interconnected, collective journey of “one for one, one for all.” I truly believe there is no need to live with the concept of an eye for an eye.
Action steps:
What will your next step be? Will you be a participant in the healing or a bystander to the harm? The choice is yours, and it starts now.
In solidarity and with joy,
Misha Safran, PCC, MA
Keynote Speaker and Relationship Coach and Strategist for the Home and Workplace
Land Acknowledgement: Born on the land of the Anacostans, Piscataway, and Pamunkey peoples. Currently living on Karkin Ohlone land.
All are valued in my practice: BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, humans of all backgrounds and ages. Through sharing my pronouns, I hope to support a safer and braver space for all professionals to share their pronouns.
#empathy #emotionalIntelligence #wellbeing #duality #resilience #educators #teachers #doctors #humanresources #healthyworkplace #conflict #disputeresolution #both #yes-and
